#RHOBH S06E01 “Life’s A Pitch” Recap

It’s that time of year again! The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are back and, it appears, better than ever! This season seems to be promising with lots of glamour, rumors of many rifts between the cast, changing alliances and the questioning of how sick Yolanda is. Unfortunately, we’re starting off this season with Yolanda and David announcing that they are divorcing.

Before I recap the episode, let’s start with their taglines.

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I’ll admit, I like Lisa Rinna but after her dark tweets about Kim Richards last season, I’m very weary of her. Her tagline is superb but I feel like there’s a word missing from it… “shit.” I guess it’s pretty obvious where that word goes.

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Not the most original but I don’t hate it.

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First of all, she’s drop dead gorgeous. Second of all, nice tagline.

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This is one of my two favorites of the taglines. Guess who’s the other. PS: Eileen is slaying in this dress! YAAAASSSS!!!!!

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Yolanda looks beautiful, as usual. I guess her tagline is pretty indicative of what’s in store for her and us in the upcoming season.

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And finally, the Queen. Lisa Vanderpump does it again! Another iconic tagline. She slays in her dress and she slays with her wit. YAAAASSSS!!!!

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We start off with Pinky. She’s been asked to throw the first pitch at the dodgers game due to her support of the LGBT community. She and Rocio are waiting to see the trainer that will teach her how to throw the ball. It’s AJ Ellis. He’s a total hunk.

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They’re in Lisa’s back yard, practicing. Ken tells Lisa to imagine that it’s Brandi that she’s throwing it to. Lisa says that she hasn’t seen or heard from Brandi since the reunion (because she’s been fired) and basically Brandi isn’t a part of her world anymore. Hallelujah!

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Personally, I’m glad that Brandi’s gone. With that being said, let’s not give her anymore attention than she deserves, shall we?

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Next up is Rin Tin Tin. She’s doing a special on Oprah’s Where Are They Now? She says that this is good because that means she had to be somewhere before. She doesn’t know where she is though. Kyle says she’s in an Amsterdam jail, LVP says she’s in a hot mess (true), Eileen says she’s hustling and Yolanda doesn’t know where Rinna is.

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One thing’s for sure though, she’s like a cockroach so she’s not going anywhere. Rinna says that being on Days Of Our Lives was the longest she’s ever worked and she hasn’t had a long stable acting job (meaning a tv show) after that. So the fact that Eileen has been acting on soaps for over 30 years is, as Lisa puts it, rare. Speaking of Eileen, it’s time to check in.

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Hey, girl, hey! Eileen says people have been asking her when she’ll retire from acting but I think she still has many years of her career ahead of her. Being on soaps, the storylines are always evolving and changing which keeps things fresh.

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Her storyline this time is complicated business stuff and a love triangle involving her character, her character’s daughter and her daughter’s boyfriend. Yes, my mom loves Eileen.

Back to Rinna, she’s doing the interview with the producers from Oprah’s Where Are They Now? That’s about it. There wasn’t anything noteworthy from it… in my opinion.

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Next up is Kyle. She’s at her store and apparently buying a pair of sunglasses worth $75,000. Wow. That kind of makes Dana look cheap. <Did you know? $25,000> Classic.

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Pinky Vanderpump calls to confirm lunch with Kyle. Since they’re so close, Kyle walks on over. Kyle asks Pinky if she’s heard from Yolanda and Pinky says barely. She’s sent her texts but it seems Yolanda hasn’t responded. It could either be A. Because they don’t like each other, B. Because Yolanda is too sick and busy or C. All of the above. I’d go with C.

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Pinky then asks Kyle how things are with her and Kyle says that she’s inked a deal with Warner Bros. to do a scripted show about her life growing up in the 70’s. Kyle is excited about it but she says both of her sisters haven’t wished her well or congratulated her on it. They’re worried about how they’ll be portrayed in the show basically.

Kyle feels that being the youngest out of 3 sisters, she still gets treated as the baby and sometimes the older ones might not think she’s capable of making her own decisions. But she’s a grown woman with 4 kids and she will make her own decisions. Okay, girl. Two snaps for you.

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Time to check in with Yolanda. She’s living in David’s condo in Beverly Hills while she undergoes more treatments for her Lyme Disease. She looks defeated.

Her friend, Angie Simpson, pays her a visit. Sidenote: Angie was supposed to be a housewife this season but she had to stop filming because she couldn’t get a working visa. Hopefully she can get that resolved and try again next season. She seems lovely. #HelpHerWithHerVisaThing as @RHousewives101 said. Let’s get this trending.

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Yolanda says that since her Lymes Disease diagnosis she’s felt totally useless, weak and hasn’t been able to drive her car for 3 years. Now, I don’t doubt Yolanda is sick, and sometimes I wonder if she’s exaggerating because of statements like this. I won’t be bashing her but I will point out some inconsistencies. I have to keep it real. So Yolanda says she hasn’t driven a car in 3 years but just last season we saw her driving from Malibu to Beverly Hills for the scavenger hunt. I wish she wouldn’t exaggerate because just one inconsistency can give everyone reason to doubt you.

She also says that if it weren’t for her kids she would have thrown herself off the balcony a long time ago. When she said that, my heart dropped. That’s truly heartbreaking.

Lisa Rinna calls her to invite her to her birthday dinner but Yolanda isn’t sure that she’s up to it, especially since David will be in Seattle. She says David has always been busy and travelling since the day they met and that shouldn’t change because she’s sick. I think it should have changed at least a little bit. That’s his wife.

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It’s time for Pinky to throw the first pitch. She’s nervous and I would be too. The amount of people she’s performing in front of? A lot. Of course, Ken and Pandora are there to support her.

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She throws the ball and it’s not as bad as she thought. “It could’ve been a fucking disaster, let’s be honest,” she says.

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Back to Rinna. She’s taking her daughters shopping. She’s talking about how important it is to keep your kids humble and how hard it is to want to buy them everything they want but to also teach them the value of things. Her daughters are beautiful.

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Eileen is doing some redecorating in her home. She doesn’t want to credit Brandi’s comments as her reasons for change but it did help her look at her house through another pair of eyes. “Hey, thanks… bitch,” Eileen says to Brandi. I love this woman.

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Lisa Rinna calls her to offer her condolences about her father-in-law’s passing and to invite her to her birthday dinner. By the way Eileen is talking about him, it’s evident that they were pretty close. That was a nice tribute to him.

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It’s time for Rinna’s birthday dinner. She picks up Kyle and they’re the first to arrive to the restaurant. Yolanda and Angie are the next to arrive. Kyle points out that Yolanda isn’t wearing any makeup and it’s shocking because she hasn’t seen Yolanda out in Beverly Hills without makeup.

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Pinky Vanderpump and Ken arrive next. Ken tells Yolanda that she looks good but says in his confessional that she looks terrible. I’ll admit, when I first saw this I didn’t think it was nice. But after watching it again, I realized that when he said she looked terrible, he meant ill, and not trying to be mean about it. At least, that’s my interpretation of it.

Pinky is also pointing out that Yolanda isn’t wearing makeup and that she’s clearly not well.

Yolanda suddenly feels tired and feels that she has to go so she leaves. On the way home she says she feels happy that she went. I’m happy she went too but wasn’t really feeling some of the reactions her attendance created.

Harry Hamlin finally arrives and gives Rinna a beautiful pair of earrings. To say thank you she admits that he’s number 16 on her speed dial. #FixItGirr.

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Mauricio comes home and Kyle talks to him about Kim. She says a part of her wants to reach out and the other part wants to show her tough love. I’ll be honest, I haven’t always been a fan of Kyle’s, but I really enjoyed her last season. With that being said, I don’t want her to keep using Kim as a storyline on the show. But then again, the show is about what’s happening in their lives and Kim is indeed a big part of Kyle’s life, so I don’t know. I still don’t like it, but I get it.

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Kyle says she doesn’t know if their relationship will ever change for the better even if Kim does change for the better. I know it’s not my family, but here’s my input: I think they both need to accept the fact that they both have a ton of resentment towards each other and it probably will never go away. They are sisters but their relationship is toxic. For the sake of the children, I think they should take Pinky’s advice and kind of detach themselves emotionally from one another. I’m not saying they should detach completely, but just enough so that they can’t hurt each other anymore.

I think they should keep their relationship more lighthearted and if they feel like somebody is saying or doing something that is going to piss them off, then detach. It sounds like sweeping things under the rug but it’s not and it’s either that or years of family therapy which none of them seem to be willing to do.

Important to note that it seems that Kyle and Kim are in a much better place now. That makes me happy. I wish them a world of luck with that. On the road to recovery!

So that’s my recap of the first episode. Sorry I took so long to write it. What did you guys think of the episode? Did you absolutely love it or were you disappointed?

Let me know in the comments section or tweet me @SalvaCam21. Byyyyyyyyyyyyyee!

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#RHOBH: A Perspective of Season 5

Hey, guys! I’m so sorry that I haven’t been blogging for the last two months. My laptop had crashed and I finally got it fixed. Since, I couldn’t blog the last few episodes of the season, I’ll give you my perspective after I re-watched the entire season. First up, my perspective of the housewives.

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Lisa Vanderpump- There’s no doubt that she’s the queen and she won this season. After being on the outs with the entire cast last season, they all came back crawling and begging her for forgiveness. There was one who had to work hard for her forgiveness, though, and that was Brandi. Lisa was smart enough to distance herself from the drama, strengthen certain friendships and realized that there was one who is not and will never be her friend. Lisa, my hat’s off to you. Here’s hoping you will return for next season.

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Kyle Richards- I actually really liked Kyle this season. I’ve never liked her for a full season since season 1. Another thing I liked is the fact that Kyle and Lisa mended their friendship. They make way better friends than they do enemies. I just hope it lasts. After re-watching the show, I felt really bad for Kyle: being on the receiving end of Brandi’s attacks, I would imagine, does not feel good. Worst of all, her sister, Kim, sided with Brandi when she was insinuating things about Kim and Kyle’s history that Brandi was not present for. By the end of the season, their relationship was shattered. I hope it’s reparable. I don’t like when those two fight.

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Lisa Rinna- Or as the Queen calls her, Rin Tin Tin. For the most part, I liked Lisa. I thought she was extremely funny, open, and eccentric. With that being said, I do feel that she studied the show, did her research and came on the show prepared. Which is fine. it makes for great TV and there’s no denying she is great TV. Unfortunately, when she does that, there will be times when her sincerity seems questionable. One thing I did not like about her, was her obsession with Kim Richards on Twitter. She was tweeting a lot of dark and negative stuff about Kim, which was unnecessary and uncalled for. She has since deleted the tweets, most of them anyway.

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Eileen Davidson- Eileen was my second favorite this season. Some may find her boring. I find her to be perfection. Her sense of humor, her honesty and her beauty makes her a winner in my book. One of the things I love the most about Eileen is that she calls it like it is without being mean about it. She admits when she’s wrong, apologizes when necessary, and puts Brandi in her place in a way that leaves Brandi speechless. To read Brandi Glanville to the point that she is left speechless is pure talent. Bravo, Eileen. Come back next season, will ya?

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Kim Richards- I’ll start off by saying that I do like Kim Richards… 70% of the time. She has a very sweet, bubbly and loving side to her, but she also has a dark, vindictive and vicious side to her as well. And this season we saw both, but most of her vicious side. I don’t know if she’s always had that side. We’ve known she has a mean side, but this side that we saw this season was dark. It was cruel. It was evil. It was… Brandi. Yup, I said it. Brandi definitely makes an impression on KIm. That’s all I’m going to say. It’s sad to re-watch the season after Kim’s arrest because now, even though we knew she wasn’t sober, she’s actually admitted it. The reunion in particular was disturbing to watch because all she did was defend her sobriety (or lack thereof).

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Yolanda Foster- Yolanda, like Lisa, definitely took a back seat from the drama this season. Which worked out great for her, because I actually ended up liking her again. I hope to see more of this Yolanda. Unfortunately, after filming, she had a terrible relapse with her Lyme Disease and her future on the show is unknown. I think she should take some time off to regroup and come back when she feels better. This season, it was evident that Yolanda tried to keep the peace and was far less judgmental of her costars. Plus, we got to see her country and see more of her wonderful mom and brother. Yolanda, I wish you a speedy recovery and I hope you find a cure for Lyme Disease.

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Brandi Glanville- Well, my mom always told me that if I had nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all. So on that note, I’m going to give my perspective on the season now.

After the disaster that was season 4, this season started off moderately slow with lighthearted drama. I actually enjoyed the peace while it lasted. It reminded me of season 1 and the reason we all started watching the show in the first place. Of course, all good things must come to an end.

Kim Richards vs Lisa Rinna

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Eileen decided to host a poker tournament at her house. Kim, who had a hernia, took one of Monty’s pain pills (for cancer) and hitched a ride with Lisa Rinna to Eileen’s house. Kim was cuckoo for coco puffs which caused Rin Tin Tin to worry and proceeded to question her sobriety to everyone except Kim. Eventually, she confronted Kim with it, right after Brandi had told Kim what RIn Tin Tin was up to. This led to a huge fight in Amsterdam on their first night there. Kim threatened to reveal a secret about Harry Hamlin (I don’t care how old he is, that man is a sexy devil) which pissed Rin Tin Tin off to the point that she almost choked the hell out of Kim, threw wine on her and smashed the wine glass on the table.

Now, both Kim and Rin Tin Tin’s feelings were valid. However, they both went the wrong way about it. I understand that what Rin Tin TIn saw was crazy and that Kim was high as a kite. I get that she was worried but she should have taken her worries to Kim, one on one and let her know that she’s concerned for her. Kim also had a right to be angry with Rin Tin Tin for talking about her sobriety to everyone except her. However, she shouldn’t have brought Harry Hamlin into the mix and she shouldn’t have started the fight between her and Eileen.

Kyle Richards vs Kim Richards & Brandi Glanville

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At the poker party, Kyle saw how whacky KIm was acting and was worried and embarrassed. Brandi was drunk as a skunk and thought she knew what was best for Kim in that situation. Yes, Brandi, because a drunk person knows what’s best for an addict who had just relapsed. Before Brandi and Kim left the poker party, Kim got pissed at Kyle and Kyle tried to get to Kim to find out what was happening but Brandi was blocking Kyle from Kim. Kyle pushed Brandi’s arm down and that prompted Brandi to twist Kyle’s hand and shove her away from her sister. It all went downhill from there. From that moment on, according to Brandi, Kyle is a “famewhore,” an awful person, an awful sister and a liar. Kim sided with Brandi after Kim felt Kyle tried to air her dirty laundry on national TV. After the show aired, Kim found out that Brandi was actually talking about Kim and her relapse, not just to Rin Tin Tin, but to her BFF, Jennifer as well. But Kim doesn’t care. Brandi is still a good friend while Kyle is a shitty sister in her eyes… I mean Brandi’s eyes. (This season, it was definitely revealed who the real Bobby Fischer was in this group. At least for me it was). Okay, maybe Kyle could have defended Kim more when Rin Tin Tin was talking about her, but Kim could have also defended Kyle when Brandi kept attacking her. They’ve both had a hand in the demise of their relationship and I have no doubt that Brandi, as usual, added fuel to that fire. In fact, she kind of dumped the entire can of kerosene on that fire. I really hope the sisters can come to a resolution now that (it’s been reported) Kim has decided to stay in rehab for 90 more days after Brooke’s wedding.

Ending with Positivity

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This season has been a roller coaster ride. It was probably the most emotional season yet. What with the Richards sisters’ feud, Yolanda’s battle with Lyme Disease and Bella’s DUI, Max wanting to find out his heritage which caused concern for Lisa and Ken that Max may want to find his biological parents someday. However, if those are the worst of their situations, then it can only go up from there. Kim has admitted that she has a problem and needs more help. I don’t know about others but that gives me hope that one day the sisters can come together and come to a resolution. It seems that Bella has learned from her mistakes and is thriving as a model. Although Yolanda is still dealing with her relapse, I am praying and hoping she gets better soon.

It was funny to watch Rin Tin Tin this season (most of the time). I have hope that next season we will see more of Harry Hamlin. Preferably in the summer time… by a pool… shirtless. Eileen was an absolute pleasure to watch. She’s witty, honest, talented and drop dead gorgeous. As for Brandi, I wish her well but I want her off the show. If she wants to be a housewife then she can go on Orange County with Tamra.

Finally, the Queen of the Hills of Beverly.

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Whether she’s making a (I have yet to taste) wicked Sangria, being happy in puppy heaven, or eating a space cake, Lisa Vanderpump is the reason we watch this show. She is what a real housewife is. She has a wicked sense of humor, a witty comeback for any shade being thrown at her, carries herself with elegance and sophistication, lives the luxurious lifestyle we tune in to see and when you throw her to the wolves, she will return leading the pack.

Okay, it’s getting late and I have to work early in the morning.

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Hope you guys enjoyed reading!

#RHOBH S05E16 “Amsterdamn” Recap

This week’s episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was crazy! We had wine throwing, glass breaking, crying, and pot eating, all in the span of two days for them. Yikes! I kept watching the entire episode like this

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So let’s break it down, shall we?

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The ladies and Brandi check into the hotel and Pinky and Eileen arrive a little later. As soon as Rin Tin Tin sees them, she sits them down and gives them the tea about her argument with Kim– I mean Psycho. Rin Tin Tin warns Eileen that Kim will be coming for her and Eileen is like “bring it on, bitch.” I love this woman.

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They take a nap and get ready for dinner. They all look sensational. Well, most of them anyway. At the dinner, Yolanda wants them to reveal their inner core to each other because she believes that most people in Beverly Hills only know the surface of each other. I think that’s marvelous, but not for this group. Yolanda opens up about Bella’s DUI while Rin Tin Tin opens up about losing her older sister of a drug overdose. She then takes the opportunity to apologize to Kim and Kim loses it. She starts to give Rin Tin Tin a verbal lashing and things get nasty when Eileen tries to defend her. She also attacks Kyle and tells her mean things; like Brandi supports her more than she does and Kathy is a better sister than she is. I didn’t see Kathy nor Brandi getting Kim on this show to have some financial stability. Nor have I heard of Kathy’s husband supporting Kim financially like a second wife like Mauricio has. Kim gets very vicious with Eileen and calls her a beast. Eileen is all

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And for a moment I thought I was watching a soap opera. Yolanda tries to intervene to diffuse the situation but Kim threatens to expose a rumor about Harry. That’s when Rin Tin Tin lost her shit. First she lunges at Kim.

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Then makes her know that you never go after her husband.

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But Kim keeps persisting and that’s when

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Rin Tin Tin throws a glass of wine at Kim and smashes the glass.

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This is arguably the most intense fight in the history of the show. So intense that it made Kyle run for the windmills.

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I have to say, when I watched the episode I kept rewinding the fight because it’s like a train wreck that you just can’t look away from. I feel the same way about Kim. Here’s the thing, Kim’s points and feelings are valid. She does have a right to be upset because I don’t necessarily agree with Rin Tin Tin going to everybody with her concerns but Kim, but I do not believe that she had bad intentions. I believe she had/has genuine concern, she just went about it the wrong way.

Now, all Rin Tin Tin was doing was apologizing for butting into Kim’s business. Any normal person would have either accepted  or not accept the apology and move on. As Pinky stated,

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Yolanda takes Rin Tin Tin outside and tries to calm her down. Meanwhile, Kim is with Brandi, venting and being completely ridiculous. Kim fails to realize that by acting the way she does, she’s just proving Rin Tin Tin and Eileen’s point. That is addictive behavior. I’m no expert, but I’ve read about it a little and I’ve had some friends who’s dealt with addiction in their family.

They all head back to the hotel and Kyle continues to cry and Pinky, Rin Tin Tin and Eileen sympathize with her. It’s a clusterfuck, and it’s only the first day.

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The next day Rin Tin Tin is in her room, in survival mode, as she says, and who comes knocking on her door? Kim. Oh fuck. She’s being polite and tells Rin Tin Tin her side of the story. In no way was there an apology for her actions and the things that she said, but Rin Tin Tin apologizes, AGAIN.

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They all meet up in the lobby and Yolanda takes them to the area where she grew up. It’s nice to see this side of Yolanda. You can tell she’s very proud of where she comes from and happy to be sharing her culture with the others. They go bike riding. It’s hilarious. Those bikes are huge!

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They ride all the way to the windmills where Yolanda meets an old flame. His name is Peter Paul. What is he? An apostle? Yolanda doesn’t remember him. Not even the fact that they kissed. She blames it on her Lyme Brain. At least Yolanda got a glimpse of what her life would’ve been like if she married the guy. Too funny.

Next, they go visit Yolanda’s mom who survived breast cancer but is now battling uterus cancer. She’s a very lovely woman with a fabulous sense of humor. Pretty much Yolanda’s mom and brother have done pot except her. Well, that needs to change. When in Amsterdam….

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Next, it’s time to go to the coffee shop. Brandi doesn’t want to do any pot because she claims she has to “be on top of her game when dealing with these women.” To me, that just means she’s looking for trouble and wants to be sober when she does it. Kyle decides she won’t do it because she doesn’t want her kids seeing her do pot on national television.

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That’s fine. Brandi, of course, has to point out that Kyle has already smoked pot with her before. Kyle still doesn’t eat the space cake and Brandi is pissed off, calling her a hypocrite. As they leave, Brandi blows up on Kyle over nothing and I wish somebody would smack this bitch.

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And there it is folks. A crazy ass episode with a two crazy ass bitches. By the way, I thought you’d all like to know that I’m doing a ranking of all the RHOBH fights in the last 5 years. Stay tuned…

What did you think of this episode? Let me know what you thought in the comments section or you can tweet me @SalvaCam21.

#RHOBH S05E15 “Welcome to Amsterdam” Recap

I can’t believe we’re already at episode 15! This season just flew by! It’s weird because I remembered I couldn’t wait for last season to be over and now I wish this season never end. But, alas, all good things must come to an end. So let’s get into it.

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It’s time for the scavenger hunt! It looks like a lot of fun. And who makes a special appearance? Camille! I wish they would bring Camille back. She may have been a dud but at least she lives the Beverly Hills lifestyle that we tune in for.

The girls are divided into three dream teams. Kyle is captain of Dream Team 1, Eileen is captain of Dream Team 2 and Yolanda, of course, is captain of Dream Team 3. As fate (producers) would have it, Brandi ends up on Kyle’s team.

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At least she has Camille on her team to offset the crazy drunk. Eileen’s team consists of her, Kim and her friend Lynn. Yolanda’s team is of her and the two Lisas. A dream team indeed. They set off to start the scavenger hunt and Eileen’s team takes an early lead.

I feel like I’m commentating on the Olympics right now. Ha ha. Does anyone have a microphone? All Kim is doing is bitching and killing the vibe of Eileen’s team.

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Why is Kim being so pissy? It’s probably because she’s mad at Eileen for trying to help repair the damage that was done to Kim’s relationship with Kyle. You know, because only Kim sees that as a bad thing. Why? Because she doesn’t think it’s appropriate for Eileen to butt into other people’s business like that. But I guess it was totally appropriate for Kim to ambush Taylor with an “intervention” to tell her that she had a drinking problem, right?

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Yolanda’s team looked as if they had the most fun though…and penalties. Pinky hopped on a bike for a hot pink second and the three of them hijacked a Beverly Hills tour bus. Rin Tin Tin’s response to anyone who might have a problem with that?

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I probably would have done the same. No, I know I would have done the same. Looking back now, I think of how lucky those tourists are. There they are, enjoying a leisurely ride on Rodeo Drive when Yolanda, Pinky and Rin Tin Tin hijacks their bus. Lucky sons of bitches.

The final destination in the hunt is Villa Blanca where they all meet up and have lunch. Yolanda has one last surprise for them though: a trip to Amsterdam! Woohoo!

I’m skipping the housewives getting ready for the trip. I don’t have much time and I’d rather comment on the fun and more important parts of the show.

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It’s time to go on the trip but before they go to Amsterdam, the ‘wives, sans Pinky and Eileen, are going to Calgary first to attend David’s charity event. Before the trip, though, Brandi told Kim about Rin Tin Tin’s talk with her after they did her podcast. Remember? The one where Rin Tin Tin tried to get to the bottom of Brandi’s behavior and Brandi deflected by throwing Kim under the bus? Yeah, so not only did she tell Kim that Lisa R. was worried about her sobriety, she completely failed to mention her part in the conversation. That’s Brandi for you. Always deflecting and trying to act like her hands are clean. But in the words of Kenya Moore: “Your hands are not clean, they’re full of grease.”

So on the plane, Kim is giving Rin Tin Tin the cold shoulder and the silent treatment. Rin Tin Tin asks her what her problem is and Kim blows up on  her. She yells at her and berates her like a child, even after Rin Tin Tin apologizes more than once. It was uncomfortable to watch. Kyle looked the way I felt watching this. I can only imagine how she felt, being right between them. Yikes.

I will say, Kim’s feelings are valid, but as usual, she picks the worst times to have an argument. Awkward to say the least.

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The ladies are in Calgary. Yolanda, Kyle and Rin Tin Tin are in the first limo and are running late so they won’t be waiting for Thing 1 and Thing 2. Yolanda hopes that the argument on the plane does not set the tone for the trip. LOL, oh, Yolanda, you have no idea. Rin Tin Tin says that she got Kim’s message loud and clear. She also said that this issue hits close to home for her because both of Harry’s brothers died from alcoholism and Harry has been sober for 3 years himself.

They arrive to the event. Brandi is wearing the dress she wore during a promo shoot for RHOBH when she joined in season 2. The only difference is, now she looks older, cattier and more tipsy. Oh, and those bangs were hideous.

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The event was a total success. Rin Tin Tin’s got some moves, Kyle kissed the king of lips, Steve Tyler and most importantly, David managed to raise $8.2 million. Wow. That is amazeballs!

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The housewives are now officially in Amsterdam, but the episode’s almost over. Sad face. Kim blows up on Kyle over nothing. They should’ve named this episode “Kim’s bitch fits.” It seems more appropriate. Now Kyle’s upset and uncomfortable and jet lagged. Thanks a lot, Kim.

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What did you guys think of this week’s episode? Let me know in the comments section or tweet me @SalvaCam21.

In next week’s episode, shit hits the fan.

#RHOBH S05E14 “Surprise!” Recap

Apologies for the late blogging but I’ve been super busy these days. For the last few weeks I’ve been working 10-12 hours a day non-stop. Finally found some time off to do a bit of blogging. Since I don’t have time to blog about all the episodes that I missed, I’m just going to give my brief opinions on them.

Episode 12: Watching Lisa V struggle with the fact that Max wants to learn more about his heritage makes me appreciate my mom even more. I feel bad for Kim and Kyle. I feel bad for Kyle because Kim is allowing Brandi to come between her and her sister and I feel bad for Kim because she is clearly not sober and Brandi is manipulating her into believing Kyle doesn’t care for her. I do believe Kyle loves and cares for her sister but Kyle still has a teenager and a child to raise. Brandi is a bitch. Lisa R. and Eileen are amazing and Yolanda is currently on my good side and in my thoughts and prayers as she battles her relapse with Lyme Disease.

Episode 13: The reactions of Kyle and Lisas V and R to Eileen’s movie is hilarious! Watching Lisa V and Pandora cry because they’re worried Max wants to connect with his biological family breaks my heart. I do not ever want or like to see them cry. She must also be relieved after Max said that he doesn’t want to look for his biological family after getting the results. Brandi is an even bigger bitch for likening her drinking to Bella’s. Yolanda is a good woman for keeping her composure and not strangling the hell out of that woman. Eileen is lovely for trying to mediate between Kim and Kyle. Kim has no reason to dislike Eileen. Kim is being ridiculous.

And now let’s get to episode 14, shall we?

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The episode starts off with Kyle visiting Lisa V. Well, not really. It actually starts off with Yolanda but since Brandi is visiting her, I’m skipping it. Kyle is angry and hurt that Kim continues to allow Brandi to come between them.

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Lisa advises Kyle to not pay attention to what Brandi says because she’s only looking for a reaction. I agree. Everything Brandi does is for shock value and a lot of the women give her the reactions that she’s looking for. The quickest way to shut that parasite down is to ignore her.

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Eileen and Vince are out on a date night. I like these two together. They have a fun banter about them. They’re like what Adrienne and Paul tried to be. I feel like I’ve said that before but I don’t care because it’s true.

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She is arranging a table read at her house and is wise enough to not invite Brandi this time. She makes it clear there will be no alcohol this time because these women are already turned up enough as it is. Have I mentioned how much I love this woman? Her ability to read people will be legend.

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Back to Lisa V, she’s playing with her dogs while waiting for Lisa R. to arrive. When she comes, they go to Eileen’s together. I love the Lisas together. They need their own spin off. I’ll keep repeating it until it comes true. On their way, Lisa is worried about Kim. She needs her relationship with her sister to be solid. I agree and so does Lisa R. Lisa R. wants to do a Kimtervention but Lisa V. assures her that that’s not a good idea. Listen to Pinky, Rin Tin Tin! She speaketh from experience…eth!  Rin Tin Tin doesn’t know why everyone is so scared of Kim. I don’t think they’re scared, I think they just don’t want to deal with the drama from her because we’ve seen her lose it when asked if she took a sleeping pill. Also, I believe that they don’t say anything on camera because they’re trying to protect her.

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Kyle picks Kim  up and they’re both acting like everything is fine. They haven’t seen each other since the lunch between her and Kyle. Kyle says sometimes it’s best to brush things under the carpet. Little things maybe, but not when you have a blow out like you did at the lunch. When you brush too many things under the carpet, it’s only a matter of time before somebody trips and explodes…like at Taylor’s birthday party in season 1. (The limo fight between Kim and Kyle).

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It’s time for Vince’s table read. Rin Tin Tin is not happy with the fact that she’s the narrator. The script is rather confusing so Rin Tin Tin sums it up for us: “Basically, it’s someone ‘Poker-fucking a puppet.”

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They all head over into the kitchen. Rin Tin Tin asks Kim how she’s doing and Kim basically says she’s  under a lot of stress with Monty and everything. They try to offer their support but Kim responds with a “Blah, blah, blah…”

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Very well said, Rin Tin Tin.

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Yolanda is at home and I’m mortified at how many  pills she has to take in a day. She takes more pills in one day than I take in a year. Jeez!

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Her party planners are over to plan the scavenger hunt around Beverly Hills and I’m looking forward to it. It looks like a lot of fun. Actually, it is. I have participated in a couple with my friends when I was in high school.

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It’s time for Pinky’s party! Yay! Ken has her believing that they’re having an intimate dinner with Mohammed and he stages a problem at PUMP for them to fix. Lisa is none too pleased about that, but little does she know, she’s in for a big surprise.

By the way, I see Brandi there and I have no idea why. I guess that’s what happens when you skip a few scenes. Oops. Everybody is hiding behind the bar and when Ken and Lisa arrive, they all emerge from the bar and scream. The look on Lisa’s face was priceless, but I think Giggy might have been more surprised than she was.

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Mohammed makes a lovely speech, Brandi makes fun then excuses herself to the bathroom. Lisa makes a speech, it’s funny, Brandi returns and Lisa sends her off for her next punishment: karaoke. I can see why that would be a punishment but it’s also kind of a punishment for the other guests to have to listen to that screeching. I’ve heard cats in heat that sound far better than that.

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It’s Pinky’s turn to sing and she has a very classic and elegant voice. Kim, Lisa R and Kyle join her and Brandi calls them the menopause mamas because “I still get the flow, if you know what that means.” Yes, Brandi, we know you still get the flow. In fact the entire world knows you still get the flow ever since you were photographed being sloppy drunk with your ass and tampon string hanging out of your cooch. We know it’s not there for show!

Eileen comes out of the bathroom while Kyle is outside fixing her makeup. She tells Kyle what her and Lisa R have been talking about and that they both feel a moral obligation to say something since they’ve witnessed the craziness. In Kyle’s words: This is not going to end well.

What did you think of this episode? I can’t wait to see all the drama unfold in Amsterdam. It’s actually kind of sad. Let me know what you think of this episode in the comments section or tweet me @SalvaCam21.

#RHOBH S05E11 “It’s Just A Scratch” Recap

We’re back for another episode of RHOBH and this episode was more intense than last week’s. I’m going to get right to it, but before I do, I just have to say that Brandi is a gutter pig, Kim is an idiot for letting an outsider come between her and her flesh and blood and my love for Eileen is growing by the episode.

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The episode picks up right back where we left off: with Kyle and Brandi getting into a shoving match. Kyle immediately breaks down in tears and walks out to try and get Kim to talk to her but Brandi won’t let her. Kim needs to stand up to Brandi and put that bitch in her place. Brandi is a recent “friend.” She does not know the history between Kyle and Kim. I also feel that Kim is feeding information to Brandi albeit without malice, which is why Brandi is saying these things to Kyle. I mean, Brandi couldn’t just pull all of those things out of her ass. I believe Kim told Brandi distorted versions of things that happened. Why distorted? We all know, drunk or sober, Kim’s perception of reality is a wee bit off.

Lisa R. and Eileen come out from hearing the commotion and Brandi tells them that Kyle and Kim hate each other and that Kyle is jealous of Kim. I’ve said it countless times along with many others on Twitter, Brandi needs to be fired.

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Brandi goes back over to Kyle and Kim, weaseling her way in between them again. She’s backing Kyle into a corner, literally and then grabs her and is extremely aggressive and drunk. Kyle takes off her shoes and walks away while Brandi is threatening to go ghetto on Kyle. First of all, I take huge offense to that. I grew up in the ghetto and Brandi is not ghetto. She is ratchet to the gutter level. She is a gutter pig. A piece of shit. You get the point. Brandi tells Kyle that she is mad at her because Kyle has never been there for Kim and that she has been there for Kim more than her. Every time I think this bitch can’t go any lower, she proves me wrong.

Kim chooses to stay with Brandi while Lisa R. rides home with Kyle. Kim is disgusting for letting that dirt bag go after her sister like that. I have absolutely no respect for her. Though I will say it makes sense that they are best friends because they both refuse to take responsibility for their actions and tend to shift the blame on to others.

In the car ride with Kyle, Lisa R. understands what Kyle is going through because HH has watched both of his brothers die from alcoholism within six months of each other. That’s sad. To lose one brother is heartbreaking but to lose both in less than a year is tragic. She says that you can’t help Kim unless she wants to be helped and she has a point. She also says that Brandi is a drunk. You hit the nail on the head, Lisa!

After everyone leaves, Eileen and Vince are talking about the cluster fuck that was poker night. She believes that family is the most important thing and for Brandi to get between that is not cool. She says Brandi is toxic. See why I’m loving her more and more? She’s a good judge of character…or lack thereof.

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Yolanda is back home and she’s FaceTiming with Bella. It’s funny to see Yolanda trying to figure out how it works. Reminds me of my mom except my mom still doesn’t understand it.

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Taking Bella to New York was more emotional to her than taking Gigi because of Bella’s DUI. It’s nerve wracking to let Bella be on her own but there’s nothing she can do about it and she has to accept that Bella is going exactly where she wants to go. I’m glad she realizes this, but it’s starting to get redundant. I don’t know how many times you can say the same thing over and over again.

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Lisa V. is at home waiting for Ken to bring Rumpy Pumpy back from training camp. He’s been gone for three months. She says that he’s the naughtiest dog out of the bunch and from what we’ve seen last season, it’s true. But I can’t imagine her staying mad at him for too long, or at all because how can you? He’s just a beautiful creature!

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Ken finally arrives and he brings Rumpy home…along with a surprise. Rumpy fell in love and has a girlfriend! First of all, I’d just like to say that I’m officially depressed because a dog has a better love life than I do. He’s still basically a puppy and he already found his soul mate. Shit.

Her name is Avery and she’s a chubby, furry beauty. Lisa says that’s why she loves Rumpy, because he’s not a superficial dog. LOL! With Avery being the newest addition to the Vanderpump-Todd family, Lisa has seven fur babies in total. I wish Lisa would get another spin off with her dogs. I think they could call it “101 Pomeranians” or “Vanderpup Rules.” Yes? No? Of course, yes!

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Lisa calls Kyle to check in on her. Kyle is still shocked but is worried about Kim because now Kim has been admitted in the hospital. Yikes.

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Kyle believes that Brandi owes her an apology for getting physical with her, for the things she said to her and for coming between her and her sister. Good luck with that. That gutter pig will not apologize. Kyle assures Lisa that she will still attend her charity jewelry party as the cause is something very near and dear to her heart.

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Yolanda is having breakfast and her son, Anwar, joins her. I think this is probably the second or third time we’ve seen him since Yolanda joined the show. If I’m not mistaken, Anwar is 15 years old and he’s already taller than Yolanda. And Yolanda is like 5’10. Wow.

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She says that because she was single for a good amount of his childhood, he took the role as the male of the family very seriously from an early age. He seems like a sweet kid and looks exactly like Yolanda. She says that he’s felt a lot of sadness ever since both of his sisters left home to go to New York. Don’t worry, Anwar, they won’t be gone forever.

Next is Brandi and I’m skipping her.

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Kyle is about to head out to visit Kim and Mauricio comes home. Kyle tells him that Kim is in the hospital. She still doesn’t really know yet. The only thing she knows is that Kim was in a lot of pain and Monty had to take her to the hospital. I don’t think Kim should be the only one looking after Monty. Clearly she’s not emotionally or mentally equipped to deal with the stress of it all.

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Kyle says that there’s a whole other dynamic to her relationship with Kim because of her sobriety and her inability to not always know how to handle it. I feel that these two should go to therapy. I believe that there are still some resentment that is buried deep between the two of them and unless they express those feelings, then their relationship will remain fragile.

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Lisa R. is preparing for her party. She’s freaking herself out and making me laugh at the same time. I love this woman. She’s perfection for this show. I don’t know why she waited this long to join the show. I wish she had joined in season 3. Maybe if she did, the producers would’ve never promoted Brandi to full-time housewife.

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Lisa says that basically if she throws a bad party then she’s a bad person. LOL. No, love. The only way you’ll be a bad person is if you end up like Brandi. So bad party or not, you’re good.

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Eileen goes to Villa Rosa as she’s going to the charity party with Lisa V. Lisa’s guard swan almost goes after her and it’s hysterical.

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Eileen notices the swing and Lisa assures her that she has a swing but she’s not a swinger…yet! She fills Lisa in on the poker party. All I can see in Lisa’s face is the fact that she’s made the right choice in not investing in a friendship with Brandi again. Lisa is not surprised about any of the things Eileen is telling her about Brandi. Neither are we, Lisa. Neither are we.

She also tells Lisa about Kim being a little off and Lisa points out that sober or not, Kim has always been a little off.

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Yolanda goes over to Kyle’s and she tells Yolanda about what happened at the poker party. She tells her about Kim’s behavior and that she thinks it’s due to the stress from taking care of Monty. Yolanda says she was worried about that for months because it’s more than what one person can handle.

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Kyle tells her about the physical altercation between her and Brandi and Yolanda asks if she was drinking. Duh, Yolanda. Where there’s Brandi, there’s alcohol. Why ask?

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Brandi is the first to arrive at Lisa’s event and she looks like a hot mess. Yolanda and Kyle show up next and Kyle is ignoring Brandi. Yolanda pulls Brandi aside and starts to mother her. You know, the way Lisa V used to last season and they both chastised her for it. Brandi goes into defense mode and pops off on Yolanda. Be careful, bitch. You don’t have too many friends in this circle. You may not want to push away one of the only two you have left. #BeSmart

Eileen asks to speak to Brandi and tells her that it was uncool of Brandi to insult her in her own home and to insult her house. Brandi is polite to her face and is obnoxious and nasty in her interview. While looking like one of those desperate whores on Rock of Love with Bret Michaels. 

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Kyle and Lisa V make plans to go have a drink at Villa Blanca after the event. Finally. After their make up in episode one, we haven’t really seen Lisa and Kyle getting together one on one. Out of all the friendships on the show, I enjoyed theirs the most. It seemed the most authentic out of all of them. It’s probably because they were friends before the show.

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Kyle and Lisa go to Villa Blanca for drinks. Lisa asks Kyle where does she go with Brandi from that night. Kyle says that she does get over things but the trust is gone and she believes Brandi owes her an apology.

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In her confessional, Kyle says that she can forgive Brandi, but she just doesn’t want to. I understand that. But here’s what I have to say about that: forgiveness is not for the other person, it’s for you. It’s for you to let go of the ill feelings you have for that other person so that you can have a peace of mind.

Kyle says that she has given Brandi a number of chances and has only been let down. She doesn’t want to put herself in a position to be hurt by Brandi again, emotionally or physically. I’ll drink to that. Lisa agrees. She says that she could never be friends with her after everything she’s done for Brandi, only to be betrayed. After all, how can she be friends with someone who tells you “I can destroy you?” That’s fucking creepy. Lisa said it best, “Once bitten, very bloody shy.”

Next week’s episode looks even more intense. Brandi is even more nasty and vindictive and Kim continues to damage her relationship with Kyle.

What did you think of last night’s episode? Let me know in the comments section or tweet me @SalvaCam21.

#RHOBH S05E10 “House of Cards” Recap

Things are finally starting to heat up in the B-H. I’ve been enjoying this season more than any other housewives franchises in a while. This episode was tragic. Why? Stay tuned and find out.

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Kyle arranges a spa day for all the women. Yolanda doesn’t attend because she’s still in New York helping Bella get settled. On their way, they start talking about their vaginas and Lisa R. says that Harry likes it hairy.

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They break into groups of three and Lisa V got stuck with Brandi. I hope she enjoys the massage! She’ll need it after being around Brandi, squawking in her ear constantly trying to say something to shock them.

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Kyle asks if Brandi and Eileen are okay after the wine toss. Lisa R. seems to think so because she apologized and Eileen accepted. Kyle always feels like Brandi is unpredictable. That’s because she is. She says that she wants to find the best in her– yeah, stop that– but she also has that nasty side. It’s not a side, it’s who she is…now. Do I think Brandi was always this mean person? No. I blame Eddie Cibrian and Brandi’s enablers– err, friends– for the monster that she’s become. Oh yeah, and the show for inflating her ego that’s gotten so big that it needs its own diamond in the intro.

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Yolanda is with Gigi at her apartment in New York. After reading Yolanda’s blog last week, I feel really bad watching her on the show. In case you didn’t know, she had a major relapse with her Lyme Disease and can no longer read or write. I hope she gets better and finds a cure.

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Yolanda is very proud of all of Gigi’s accomplishments in the last year and a half since she’s been on her own. She has a lot to be proud of. I read somewhere that Gigi is in talks to be in the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show this year. I have no idea if that is true but it would be awesome! Despite my feelings for Yolanda, she’s an amazing mom.

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It’s lunch time and the girls head out for wine tasting. Sidenote: I read Kyle’s blog before watching the episode. She says that the hotel decided to change lunch into the wine tasting. Do I believe her? Yes. I don’t think that she’d do anything to jeopardize her sister’s sobriety. Not after resolving all of their issues and clearly have rebuilt their relationship. I don’t know, there’s something about Kyle that’s making me like her this season. This is the longest I’ve gone in a season liking Kyle since season 1.

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It’s very awkward at the wine tasting. Clearly the hotel knows that there’s one person who doesn’t drink and the wine educator asks Kim if she wants to smell the wine. No, moron, she’s sober! Kyle is clearly uncomfortable and you can see it in her face. Kyle asks Kim if she wants to leave and she says no. Kim excuses herself and soon after Kyle goes to check on her. All is well.

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Back in New York, Bella joins Yolanda and Gigi. Yolanda says that Gigi and Bella are like the white and black swans. It’s a fierce competition in the fashion industry but Gigi is willing to help her little sister get a name for herself and solidify her spot in the fashion industry. Good for her.

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Clearly they’re both close. Sometimes, to be honest, I do feel bad for Bella. She does seem to go through the middle child syndrome, but I’m forming my opinion based on the handful of minutes we’ve seen her. They reenact a scene from America’s Next Top Model and it is cute.

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They’re finally leaving and on their way back Brandi wants to know each and every one of their fantasies. Lisa R. is doing Brad Pitt. Yuck! Yeah, I know, how dare I say that?! Kyle wants to be a professional stripper. Well, she’s got the splits part down.

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Kim wants to be on an island alone. I hear ya! And Brandi wants to walk in on her man having sex with another woman and cannot leave until he finishes. As Kyle and Lisa R. stated:

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In Brandi’s blog she says that she’s tired of the women judging her and pretending to be perfect and that it’s just a fantasy. Um, girl, nobody is even trying to be perfect. It’s deranged and masochistic for you to want to walk in and find your boyfriend banging another person in your bed. And this is the woman Stassi says she can relate to? If that was true then she would be perfectly fine with Jax banging every other girl behind her back. In fact, she should have wanted to see it.

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Kyle takes Kim out for lunch. She feels bad about the wine tasting and wants to apologize to her. I thought Kim handled herself really well in that situation. Obviously she’s used to being around drunken people. Her BFF is Brandi after all.

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Kim tells Kyle that she knows she didn’t set up the wine tasting and there’s basically no reason to apologize. She is, however, angry that there was no food. I hear you. There are two things I don’t play around with, my food and my boyfriend.

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It’s poker night! I think this is the first game night since the historical game night in season 2.

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Oh, how I wish Eileen would have watched the show before she signed on. That way she could have prepared for the disaster that was about to happen. Coincidentally, Lisa V wasn’t at the first game night either. Smart woman. Eileen and Vince have a cute banter between each other. It’s like what Adrienne and Paul should have been.

Kyle picks up Brandi and Brandi has three champagne bottles in her hand. Sounds about right. Brandi tells Kyle that she feels that she owes Kim an apology. Huh? That doesn’t even make any sense. Also, her reason for wanting to apologize doesn’t make any sense. Shut up, Brandi. It’s just another way to make it all about you.

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Kim picks up Lisa R at her house and they head to Eileen’s together. Kim is acting very strange and Lisa R immediately asks her if she’s been drinking or on drugs.

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The whole trip to between Kim and Lisa is uncomfortable to watch and I can’t even fathom what it felt like to actually be Lisa in that situation. I would have jumped out the door like Sister Mary Robert in Sister Act. 

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Meanwhile, Lisa V is in Cabo on vacation. Well deserved, if you ask me.

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She’s on the beach with Pandora, Jason, Giggy and Ken. And I believe in her blog she said her brother was there as well. I was bummed we didn’t get to see him. I was really looking forward to seeing him. We actually get the rare opportunity to see Giggy naked! O-M-G! #Porndography

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Kim and Lisa are the first to arrive at Eileen’s. Lisa looks so relieved to be out of the car with Kim. Kyle and Brandi arrives next and Eileen gives them a tour of her house. Brandi says that Eileen’s house makes her think of Norman Bates and tells Eileen that the house looks American Psycho-ish. You should know, right, Psycho– I mean Brandi?

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Vince is trying to teach them how to play poker. Brandi is already drunk and Kim’s behavior is erratic. When I see Brandi and Kim together, Brandi looks like her enabler. The sad part is, I don’t think Brandi realizes that’s what she’s doing. It makes sense though. All of her “friends” enable her, so she’s enabling Kim. Kim is hanging out too much with Brandi because there are “stupids” and F-bombs flying all over the place. She curses out Lisa and warns her to be careful.

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Kyle looks mortified. I feel bad for both sisters. I feel bad for Kim because she’s going through all of this in front of the cameras, for the whole world to see and I feel bad for Kyle because this is clearly bringing up old issues.

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Kyle is trying to understand the game but Brandi is drunk and loud and obnoxious and keeps calling Kyle stupid. Kyle’s mood after that?

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Brandi says that Kyle is jealous of Kim because Kim was a successful actress unlike Kyle. If I’m not mistaken, wasn’t Kyle in legendary films like the original Halloween and Halloween II? Not to mention worked with legendary actors? What has Brandi done? Take a couple of pictures and married a soap star who cheated on her and made her famous for it?

Kyle has had enough and excuses herself to the bathroom. Kim tries to follow her but Brandi seems to not want her to. It’s evident that Brandi is trying to put a wedge between Kim and Kyle’s relationship. She tried to do it with Lisa and every other cast member last season.

In the bathroom, Kim tells Kyle that she took one of Monty’s pain-killers. I’m not trying to make fun or anything, I legitimately want to know; doesn’t that mean that Kim relapsed if she took a pain pill?

After coming out of the bathroom, Kim feels uncomfortable and wants to go home. Before she leaves she goes to say goodbye, but Brandi tries to stop her again. Kim makes a passive aggressive comment to Kyle– to me it looks like she’s mad at Kyle for confessing to taking a pill on camera. Kyle is clearly confused and is trying to talk to Kim but Brandi keeps blocking her. This is bad. Kyle repeatedly asks Brandi to get out of the way and Brandi continues to block Kyle from getting to Kim. Kyle, frustrated, confused and concerned, pushes Brandi out of the way and Brandi pushes Kyle back.

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I don’t care what Brandi’s excuse is, you do NOT get in the middle of family business. Believe me, it is never a good idea. A former friend of mine tried to do just that and he learned his lesson the hard way. Brandi may feel like she was being a good friend to Kim but blood is thicker than herpes, and when Kyle and Kim make up, who will look like an even bigger asshole for meddling? Brandi. As I said before, this episode was tragic, and this is why.

What did you think of last night’s episode? Let me know in the comments section or tweet me @SalvaCam21.

Next week, the drama continues from poker night, Rumpy Pumpy comes back home, Yolanda scolds Brandi about her drinking, Kim is in the hospital and Kyle is done with her friendship with Brandi.